info said:
I'm familiar with this, but also quite fuzzy. I believe in iTunes under the device "Apps" tab there should be a checkbox under the app icon which when unchecked will prevent it from reappearing on the iPad. Since the poet did not seem to confirm it, I am unsure though.
I don't belive the OP is having problems with keeping it off the iPad, but that it won't stop trying to download in iTunes on the computer. Maybe I'm missreading that. Anyway, i've never had any luck convincing iTunes to give up on downloading something once it gets into the queue. No matter how many times you abort and delete the partial download it just starts it over the next time it checks the store.
The only way I've ever been able to deal with it was to let the dowload finish, then delete the file. I'm almost certain there should be a way, but the method eludes me. Well, you could probably call Apple and have them remove it from the queue, but I'd rater deal with it myself.
Edit: I see I took so long typing that the OP has already clarified the point. :0