What is the aerodynamic profile of an Ipad?

Short tale of woe, and before I get deluged with thinly veiled innuendos of theft, please save the time and bandwidth.

1. Dropped Ipad 1 and cracked screen.
2. Being one who likes to maintain his own, I decided to fix myself.
3. Broke fragile cable connectors on logic board installing screen.
4. FINALLY found a used one on Ebay from a "gold star" seller.
5. Installed logic board and screen. everything was rosy until Itunes would not activate.
6. Discovered that used logic board was registered with Apple. (The Ipad could have been stolen from some sweet old lady, I don't know and can't find out I sent emails to the "gold star" ebay seller in an attempt to trace the donor Ipad)
7. Discovered that Apple can reset serial numbers.
8. After enduring the Apple Tech support maze, I took a position in Samsung stock.
9. Looking for options...

I do have a German Sheppard that I'm training to fetch.

 

Um, ok.

 

Please be more clear on what you exactly want.
Thanks.

Sent from K48AP, the classic

 

Bonehead move, but ok.

Bonehead moves #2, 3 and 4. No sympathy.

Better treatment than you deserved.

Wrong forum. Go post in a Samsung forum for advice about alternate options. Sounds like Apple did you a solid when they clearly did not have to