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Offtopic? Is there any conection betwin ipad obsesive using and hair loss?

Lisirein

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I
m 30 and f and losing my hair totaly
And tapping all day
Besides being time consuming
My hair just falls or torn with root when combing
I had a full curly long hair
Now it feels like old mens hair
I cant stand it
And why im bothered sudenly by the knots in my hair that i lived with all these years?
Any conection ? No?

Im holding the ipad in weird positions insted of standing or on table
More ilke laptop
Or book
As book and music player
And npapaer
Lucky me lots of uses are not availble in my country
Cant stand it
 

skimonkey

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LOL...I have not found any clinical correlation between the obsessive iPad use and it's direct relationship to hair loss...unless one of the variables is being manipulated. Manipulated by pulling your hair out, that is? :)
 

Bob Maxey

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Most definitely there is.

I AM BACK by the way, but not for long, so I'll say goodbye now in case I forget. You new people do not know me, but I am the official IPF angry pissy arse and if you read me long enough, I'll make you hair fall out faster than your iPad ever will.

But anyway, yes. So far, I have found that iPads cause sterility, loss of hearing, they curdle milk, cause fish to lose their fins, cause body odor and they cause 34% of all divorces in this country. BTW, I am told that once Jobs swatted a kitten on the bum so the company is downright evil.

OK, I can’t actually prove Jobs ever raised a hand to a delicate and innocent kitty, but there is probably a web site to confirm my guesses and lies.

Apple knows about hair loss issues. It has to do with the special flux Foxconn uses to solder components. It emits fumes that will permeate your iPad case then your clothes. Your hair will be gone, eventually. Damm you Apple . . . us bald people want satisfaction.

Did you know that every person that has or will ever use an iPad is dead; in the process of dying or will eventually die? Every last one of them and that is demonstrably true.

Bye!
 

Bob Maxey

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I m 30 and f and losing my hair totaly And tapping all day Besides being time consuming My hair just falls or torn with root when combing I had a full curly long hair Now it feels like old mens hair I cant stand it And why im bothered suddenly by the knots in my hair that i lived with all these years? Any conection ? No?

By tapping all day long on the iPad's soft keyboard, you introduce vibrations that travel up your arm, into your collar bone where they are transferred to your head. Then the follicles begin to vibrate; the vibrations widen the follicles ever so slightly and your hair falls out. This happens faster if you tend to rock out to music while tapping on the soft keyboard.

The reason this does not happen when you use regular keyboards is the clicks produced by the keys of a standard computer keyboard are a negative frequency that tends to cancel out the vibrations that typically travel up your arm, into your collar bone where they are transferred to your head and therefore, the follicles do not vibrate and the vibrations will not widen the follicles ever so slightly and your hair will not falls out.

We scientists call this "puckering."

The vibrational vortex force produced by the soft keyboard on the iPad is represented by X=2x x 3.142x/4B of A x 4.2 x key travel length divided by the surface tension of the glass; squared by -4 x the value of clicks minus the constant 5.25. This correlation was first discovered by Francois Tuttle Esquire, in 1934 and first reported at the twelfth annual International Conference on Computational Intelligence and Information Systems in 1936, in Copenhagen.

The formula the class action lawyers will likely use against Apple is: X + -X = 0.

This problem is also discussed in the current JAMA.

By the way, rap music and poorly played banjos also cause hair loss if listened to on your iPad.
 

Pinkpoison

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By tapping all day long on the iPad's soft keyboard, you introduce vibrations that travel up your arm, into your collar bone where they are transferred to your head. Then the follicles begin to vibrate; the vibrations widen the follicles ever so slightly and your hair falls out. This happens faster if you tend to rock out to music while tapping on the soft keyboard.

The reason this does not happen when you use regular keyboards is the clicks produced by the keys of a standard computer keyboard are a negative frequency that tends to cancel out the vibrations that typically travel up your arm, into your collar bone where they are transferred to your head and therefore, the follicles do not vibrate and the vibrations will not widen the follicles ever so slightly and your hair will not falls out.

We scientists call this "puckering."

The vibrational vortex force produced by the soft keyboard on the iPad is represented by X=2x x 3.142x/4B of A x 4.2 x key travel length divided by the surface tension of the glass; squared by -4 x the value of clicks minus the constant 5.25. This correlation was first discovered by Francois Tuttle Esquire, in 1934 and first reported at the twelfth annual International Conference on Computational Intelligence and Information Systems in 1936, in Copenhagen.

The formula the class action lawyers will likely use against Apple is: X + -X = 0.

This problem is also discussed in the current JAMA.

By the way, rap music and poorly played banjos also cause hair loss if listened to on your iPad.
LOL,my first hearty laugh of the day,thanks Bob,you're a tonic.
 

Gabriel1

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Bob Maxey said:
By tapping all day long on the iPad's soft keyboard, you introduce vibrations that travel up your arm, into your collar bone where they are transferred to your head. Then the follicles begin to vibrate; the vibrations widen the follicles ever so slightly and your hair falls out. This happens faster if you tend to rock out to music while tapping on the soft keyboard.

The reason this does not happen when you use regular keyboards is the clicks produced by the keys of a standard computer keyboard are a negative frequency that tends to cancel out the vibrations that typically travel up your arm, into your collar bone where they are transferred to your head and therefore, the follicles do not vibrate and the vibrations will not widen the follicles ever so slightly and your hair will not falls out.

We scientists call this "puckering."

The vibrational vortex force produced by the soft keyboard on the iPad is represented by X=2x x 3.142x/4B of A x 4.2 x key travel length divided by the surface tension of the glass; squared by -4 x the value of clicks minus the constant 5.25. This correlation was first discovered by Francois Tuttle Esquire, in 1934 and first reported at the twelfth annual International Conference on Computational Intelligence and Information Systems in 1936, in Copenhagen.

The formula the class action lawyers will likely use against Apple is: X + -X = 0.

This problem is also discussed in the current JAMA.

By the way, rap music and poorly played banjos also cause hair loss if listened to on your iPad.

I need a little clarification here, can you confirm that the formula is X+(-X)=0? Because if it is plus or minus X instead then the answer could actually be 2X and as we all know, where X is greater than 0 hair growth is actually stimulated.

Of course to take this to its natural conclusion......M+X=breakfast!

The Archangel
 
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skimonkey

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Bob...I am speechless, but laughing all the way to your fine comments of the day! :)

I will definitely check that scholarly article in JAMA to read their evidence!
 

Bob Maxey

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I need a little clarification here, can you confirm that the formula is X+(-X)=0? Because if it is plus or minus X instead then the answer could actually be 2X and as we all know, where X is greater than 0 hair growth is actually stimulated.

Of course to take this to its natural conclusion......M+X=breakfast!

The Archangel

I confirm nothing. Nothing I say. Higher math is beyond me; I found the data at http:\\www.facespacepage.twitter_google_do...googledroid+2114FA_repot.html_flash/index.zip

Clearly, the math is above you so stop complaining, I'll hear none of it. I found it on the web so it is correct. I know nothing. I report the news. I never make it up. I never lie. My mother liked you better than she liked me. I am way cooler. Be quiet. Never question the Bob dag nabbit!!!
 
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